What I Do, Although Still Trying to Figure It Out

Sometimes, when people ask me what I do, I pause for a moment. Not because I don’t have an answer, but because my answer feels like it’s still unfolding. I’m a graphic designer and a writer, two paths that allow me to create, to express, and to connect with people through ideas and visuals. But if I’m being honest, I’m still piecing it all together. I’m still figuring out the “how” and the “where” of my journey, even as I move forward one step at a time.

I haven’t reached the peak of my career yet. In fact, there are days I feel like I’m standing at the base of a long, winding mountain path, with no clear view of the top. But I’m learning that it’s not always about the peak. Sometimes, it’s about the climb, the slow, challenging, breathtaking climb that shapes you more than the summit ever could.

This journey has not been without losses. I’ve faced disappointments that left me questioning my choices. I’ve worked hard on projects that didn’t get the recognition I hoped for. I’ve faced days where the weight of uncertainty felt heavier than my dreams. And yet, each time, I’ve made the choice not to see these moments as evidence that I’m failing, but as chapters in the bigger story of my becoming.

I used to ask myself, “Why is this happening to me?” But that question only led to frustration and self-pity. Now, I’ve replaced it with a different kind of curiosity. I ask, “How is this happening to me? How is this shaping me? Does this add to building the best version of me?” Those questions shift my perspective. They remind me that every experience, even the painful ones, carries a lesson, a refining process, and a hidden gift.

As a creative, the process is just as important as the product. Designing and writing have taught me patience. They’ve taught me that inspiration doesn’t always show up on schedule, and success rarely arrives overnight. They’ve taught me to be present in the work itself, to see meaning in the messy drafts and the trial-and-error designs. And perhaps most importantly, they’ve shown me that my worth is not determined by the approval of others, but by my own commitment to grow, improve, and stay true to what I believe I can do.

Faith has been my anchor through it all — faith in God, faith in the process, and faith in my own capacity to rise again no matter how many times I fall. There are days I’m running with full confidence, and days I’m crawling, but I keep moving. I keep showing up for myself. I keep reminding myself that I’m not behind; I’m right where I need to be for this chapter of my life.

The truth is, I’m still learning. I’m still finding my voice as a writer and refining my style as a designer. I’m still building the kind of career I dream of — one that reflects both my creativity and my values. But while I may not have it all figured out yet, I know I’m becoming. And that matters more to me than having a perfect plan.

So I’ve made a vow to myself to embrace the lessons, to hold onto hope, and to see every challenge not as a sign of defeat, but as proof that I’m growing. I’ll look at my journey with gratitude, even when it feels hard, because I believe these moments will one day make sense.

And maybe, when I finally stand at the peak wherever and whatever that may be, I’ll look back and realize that the climb was the real treasure. Until then, I’ll keep going, with my heart open and my faith unshaken. Because this is not the end of my story. It’s just the beginning of who I’m becoming.
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